Two people close to me have died in the past couple of weeks; suddenly and far too young. Both people were a joy to be around and were recognized by those who knew them as having exceptional talents. Both deaths feel like a tragedy.

These deaths were accompanied by two more. A close friend of mine lost a sibling and the singer, Amy Winehouse, also died during the same period of time. Again, both far too young, sudden and tragic.

So what meaning can we find in such events? Is there a meaning behind it at all?

For me (and I’m just working this out as I type), death is a potent reminder to connect to your heart. We spend a LOT of time in our heads or our guts; and by this I mean we are either thinking and trying to be rational and orderly, or we are feeling and reacting to what’s going on around us without much thought whatsoever. Our heart is where we find balance. It is literally the middle ground between our basic emotional responses and needs (chakras 1, 2, 3) and our higher cognitive functioning (chakras 5, 6, 7). These meet in the middle, in our hearts (4th chakra), to give us a true and balanced message. The message guides us on what to say, do, feel and how to be in any given moment.

When people strive for ‘balance’ or to be ‘centred’, this is what they are seeking. (Note: the heart centre is not “better” than the other chakras, in fact, it needs the information/energy from the other chakras in order to function at all.) Grief is the emotional trigger and challenge for the heart centre. When we grieve we are drawn into our heart centres and more of our responses come from here.

Think about it, when someone passes away, old injuries tend to be forgotten, petty arguments cease to mean anything, and (for a time) people come together in mutual support and comfort. I believe that this is a strong reminder that, even when no one has died, this is simply the way we are meant to treat each other. Be compassionate (lower chakras) and act with respect (upper chakras). These meet in our hearts, where those who have departed now reside and help to guide us from the higher place they have now returned to.

Rest in Peace William and Chris.

Do you know that forgiveness is just another word for ‘letting go’?

Can you imagine if you could forgive everything how free you would be? How light you would feel? How unburdened your mind would be? How at peace would be your soul?

It is one of the most difficult things to do in life, to forgive. It requires us to face our fears, have enough faith to take a risk, acceptance of life as it is, and a willingness to let go of things we have held onto so tightly they are a part of us.

One form of forgiveness is forgiving others. This can happen with or without the other person’s knowledge. That is insignificant. What is significant is that you feel the forgiveness within you; that you have truly let go of what you were holding on to. You will have to face your fears related to this person/the incident/the idea of letting go of your anger/hurt/resentment/hatred. You will have to find faith to risk relinquishing those emotions and any illusions of control you have related to “justice” or “karma”. You have to accept that what happened happened, and there is no changing the past. Acceptance does not mean condoning. And you will have to find within you a willingness to open that clenched fist and release the person and everything related to the issue you are forgiving into the hands of Life.

Another form of forgiveness is to seek forgiveness from others. We usually prefer this to involve the other person, but that is not always possible or necessary. And either way, you have no control over another person’s ability to forgive, even when you seek to make amends. The attempt to seek forgiveness must be done with no expectations and for one’s own good.

A third form is self-forgiveness. This can be necessary (most often is, in fact) even when dealing with an incident where others acted upon you. We can often hold onto a belief that we are somehow to blame, at least in part for what happened. We can hold anger towards ourselves for not “getting over it” or for letting it dominate so much of our lives, thoughts or behaviours. The process is the same; face the fear of acknowledging your true feelings towards yourself in this matter, have faith that you can risk letting go of something that has become a part of your identity (perhaps being a victim), accept that what is done is done, and be willing to let go of your shame/guilt/anger/sadness.

The last kind of forgiveness is the ability to forgive Life. We often overlook this one, yet it can be profoundly helpful in finding true closure around an issue or for starting the process of forgiveness when you’re still not able to forgive the other or yourself. Ask yourself, can you forgive Life for you having experienced something (a trauma), or for something beyond your control having happened (a natural disaster)? Can you step back and look at the incident as a play and every one involved as the actors on a stage? Yet in this play called “Life”, none of the actors knows how each scene will unfold and each is only doing the best they can with what they have to keep the play moving forward.

I offer these thoughts and questions for your consideration. From experience, I know the end result of forgiveness is Freedom; and that is a prize worth walking on the coals for.

I define career as what you choose to do to earn a living. It is not who you are, despite how identified some people may become with their career or job title. Who we are is the same for everyone (life’s expression of itself); what we do is different amongst groups of people and may change throughout your life. Your vocation, however, is how you do what you do.

For some people this expresses itself quite literally through their chosen career; someone with a calling to be a healer becoming a doctor or nurse, for example. For others it may not be so obvious; someone with a calling to be a teacher working for a large retailer in sales may end up training all the new staff and ultimately end up in corporate training full time. The point is that your vocation, your calling, will find a way to come out in everything you do because it characterizes HOW you do things.

Now, in considering this for yourself, you may wonder what your vocation is. Some people have an aptitude for a variety of things, teaching, healing, leadership, etc. Take a good look at all aspects of your life, how you think about things, how you interact with others, how you problem solve. These can all give you clues as to what your vocation really is. It’s taken me a while to figure out my own, whether it was healing or teaching, since I love both and have an aptitude for both. However, when I looked at both in the larger context of my life, I realized that even the teaching I do is about healing and I believe that a lot of people receive healing when they attend a workshop with me.

I also believe that vocations are not as widespread as careers, there is a shorter list and it is built upon some clear archetypes. I have included my list here, though I make no claims that it is complete! If you discover you have a vocation that I have not included on my list, please feel free to leave a comment or email me:)

VOCATIONS
Healer
Teacher
Philosopher
Leader
Entertainer
Rescuer
Artist
Builder
Inventor
Nurturer
Adventurer

I’ve come to understand faith as a the recognition of our oneness with All That Is. It is love of Self. And it is trust in Life to support you, guide you and help you along the path towards you fulfilling your highest potential. Faith allows me to risk; to take a chance on doing what my heart is guiding me to do, regardless of any fear, regardless of the outcome.

Faith does NOT mean things will always turn out as I expect or hope, or that they will even go as planned or that I will like the outcome. But there will always be something in the experience that was perfect for me at that moment; a lesson, a meeting, an insight – some kind of growth (which can at times be painful).

And that’s the point really, isn’t it? If life is about the journey, not the destination, there must be continual movement and growth. Having faith is the key to allowing that movement without resistance, without fear, and in absolute freedom.

Yes, his name is Frank. He’s only recently acquired a name, but he likes it and it suits him very well. I’ve been in this house exactly 11 years now and I’m only just starting to understand the full extent to which your house has an effect on your entire life.

Frank had high hopes when my ex-husband and I bought this house that we would take good care of him and make him pretty (yes, one of Frank’s greatest desires is to be pretty). We did the best we could at the time in some areas of the house, but others were left unattended or poorly looked after.

Over the years, Frank has expressed his displeasure at his general state of repair by persisting to fall apart in some small ways (patio doors that require a crowbar to open, resulting in three broken handles…the metal actually broke…), so the message has finally reached home (no pun intended). We need to care for Frank like we care for our children. He does, after all, provide us with shelter from the elements; space to play, work, eat, sleep; a place to come back to every day and gather as a family. He literally welcomes us into the core of his being and holds us there, safe and warm.

So with that in mind – and recognizing our budget – I made a commitment to Frank: I will give him an allowance of $20 per week to save up for things cosmetic (curtains, paint, shelves, etc) and would make it a priority to figure out getting some of the larger things done (roof, yard, flooring, etc). And that’s what we’re doing!

Frank, it turns out, expresses his gratitude for this loving care by breathing more easily, relaxing energetically, and working with us to make these things happen…showing me what he wants done, guiding me on what to do, and letting me know when I’ve got it right.

Your house provides you with the space to make a home. Putting your heart into it makes it come alive and a space that you love and loves you back.

I discovered today that we can, in fact, grow newer. Natural time is cyclical, not linear. The universe runs on cycles that go around and around, never ending…everything natural in the universe flows this way, so why would we make ourselves the exception?

Separateness. That is what makes us do that. We scientifically and objectively analyze the universe and all that it contains; deconstructing it in an attempt to…what? The first people who engaged in this scientific pursuit were striving to understand the nature of the universe, to discover the ultimate answer to life, the universe and everything (as D.A. so eloquently put it). And the answer may well be “42″…or “sufferin’ succotash”…or “because I said so”. The answer is not the point.

Growing newer is about how we move through the cycles of our lives; understanding the patterns, learning from them, moving in an outward spiral, growing more expansive in our essence from every new experience and insight we gain in this life. Paradoxically, this outward, expansive movement is exactly how we will come back to the centre – to the core of who we truly are.

Ah, so we discover another reason we feel separate from the universe…paradox. The universe abounds with paradoxes we cannot resolve in our limited 3D, linear minds. Paradoxes, by definition, will never be resolved and are only meant to serve as reminders that while we have complete free will to choose our path, there is only one path to take; ours, freely chosen;)

It has been an interesting month; many more shifts and challenges presented themselves this month, not the least of which was my website being down for several weeks.

This was particularly challenging because I have come to enjoy writing my blog and using it as a tool to reflect on my work and my personal growth. That being said, all things are perfect and this past month was so crazy busy that my website being down allowed me to just forget about blogging altogether while I didn’t have the time to do it anyway!

It’s now the time of year where the windows are opened and the cobwebs are being dusted away, garage sales are happening so people can clear their houses of stuff they no longer need. Why not take advantage of the energy of cleaning and clearing to do some inner spring cleaning? This is a time, even more so than New Year’s, when you can start fresh both in what you choose to do and how you choose to be.

It’s amazing to me that this past month has been so busy and yet, through it all, opportunities kept arising for me to make quantum leaps forward in my spiritual (and thus human) development!

My intention over the next while is to blog on specific themes that have presented themselves and to share what I’ve learned in case you might connect with it in some way and find yourself presented with an opportunity to let go of something that is keeping you stuck.

Until then!

You might be saying, “Huh?” That’s okay, I’m just figuring this out for myself. I’ll post more as my understanding deepens.

I have continued my work with Child A (I’ll call him this in the posts from now on to respect his privacy) over the past couple of weeks and he is a great teacher. The work itself, I feel, is going pretty well. He is now very receptive to me coming and seems eager to get started doing the work. He’s also begun to open up to me verbally. We begin the sessions in silence while I close my eyes and connect to his energy to see where he’s at at that particular moment and start the process of whatever work I feel can be done at that time.

Then, when things are rolling along and there’s nothing but breathing and allowing the energy to work, I ask Child A some very mundane question and that starts the beautiful stream of consciousness conversation (during which I have very little to say). It is fascinating what comes out during these conversations, from the creative to the emotional, to the personal and the funny. I keep the energy running and pay attention to what’s happening while he’s talking. I haven’t yet experienced too much disruption of the energy while he’s talking. It’s interesting to note that this talking goes on until his mother comes into the room and then his focus goes directly to her and he usually achieves a deeper level of relaxation.

I have primarily been spending my time with him working on the first 3 chakras; my unusual perception of his sacral chakra I mentioned in my previous post. The choppy surface I described has started to smooth significantly. Today I attempted to start compressing the whirlpool and immediately had a sick feeling in my stomach, so I stopped. It wasn’t time. I was trying to be gentle, but took the feeling in my stomach as a warning to slow down and let the other work finish before I worked on the whirlpool.

Child A’s root and solar plexus chakras are doing remarkably well. Establishing a solid grounding in the root chakra is important to his sense of safety and security, while working to strengthen his solar plexus will boost his self-confidence. As the sacral is connected to emotional balance, it will be interesting to see what happens as it smooths and I slowly start to be guided how to work with the rest of it.

One funny thing that happened during the session was a premonition of sorts. I had my eyes closed and suddenly felt a small bump on the left side of my forehead. Nothing had actually hit me, and because I usually pick up on what the client is feeling by feeling it in my own body, I opened my eyes and asked Child A if there was any part of his body that was bugging him today. He said no, so I just said, “okay, good”. Then not two minutes later his mother, who was sitting close next to him turned her head and bumped him on the left side of his forehead. I didn’t say anything at the time, because you just can’t expect people to believe you when things like that happen! I, however, found it very amusing:)

I’m excited to continue my work in this area and am hopeful I may have other opportunities to work with children on the autism spectrum to see if there are consistencies. For now, Child A is a treat to work with and I’m grateful:)

Working with this child is a unique experience. His energy does not look like anyone else’s with whom I’ve worked. Not that anyone’s energy looks like anyone else’s, but his is distinctly different. He has so much light in him, that to me it’s like looking out into a vast open meadow. It’s bright sunlight and yellows and greens and pale blues. This is stunning in it’s beauty, but it also presents challenges; it makes it difficult to see because the light is blinding.

Another unique quality is his sacral chakra (this chakra is connected to emotional balance) – it wobbles. The first time I worked with him I could just see the surface of it and instead of looking like a pool where the water was circling (which is usually how the chakras present to me), it looked like a large lake with a choppy surface. The second time I worked with him, I looked deeper and could see the water underneath swirling like a whirlpool, funneling down to a point at the bottom. In general, his charkras feel a little stiff, for lack of a better word.

My goals in working with this child are to help instill in him a sense of safety and support, working to balance and open all his chakras and smooth the surface of the sacral (always I will try to remain aware of what is a healthy state for this child…not to assume his energy should look like others). I also want to help develop his sense of trust and support the other work he’s undergoing to retrain his automatic “anger” response into something different.

I’ll continue to blog about my developments with this child (with the permission of his mother) because I have a sense it will be a wonderful learning experience as an energy healer and others may like to learn from it as well!

Money, for many people, is a source of stress, anxiety, tension, and the cause of many arguments between couples. This is because money translates in our brains to “food”, “shelter”, “protection”, “security”; all the things without which we feel a deep sense of fear and dread (see earlier post with Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs) because our very survival seems to be at stake.

Fair enough. None of us wants to go hungry or be homeless, or have that happen to our family. But is that the only time we stress about money? Are we perfectly okay with it up to that point? No. I don’t think so. We know that we stress about being able to by ‘stuff”, whether for ourselves or our kids, being able to go out and do things, being able to send the kids to camp or pay for their extra-curricular activities, or travel, or have a nice house with fine things in it, or saving for retirement! Whew…it’s a long list!

And, sure, all of that stuff can be a part of living a happy and fulfilled life.

Here’s the shift. In the previous scenario, money is really the focus, the key issue. And the challenge becomes about getting as much money as you can to be able to accomplish all of these things. My new perspective (which may not work for many people, though I think it would be worth everyone trying on for a bit) is that my focus is on just going ahead and doing what I love, within my means, and having full faith that what I need will come to me.

It’s the faith part of this that is difficult. Faith and Fear can’t live together; they’ve tried and it just doesn’t work. Fear keeps crowding the space with all his black clouds and boogie men, and Faith keeps annoying the hell out of Fear with his blind confidence.

Pure, true faith is solid and assured and knows without seeing. I do live within a fairly strict budget (which gets busted all the time:)) and am always trying to find new and creative ways to live to the fullest; whether that is new ways to shop for groceries, creative bartering to get what I need while giving someone else what they need, or finding fun and free ways to enjoy myself.

In this way, truly letting go of a desire/need for money, I’m allowing a flow of real abundance to come to me. Because abundance DOES NOT equal money, or vice versa. Abundance is about life. Money is about nothing.